Author: Jonathan Nda-Isaiah

NIGERIA has finally solved its revenue crisis. Forget oil theft. Forget billionaires hiding money in Dubai. From January 2026, sex workers, popularly called hookup girls or run girls, will be required to pay tax under the Federal Government’s new tax reforms. Yes, you read that correctly – the government now wants prostitutes to file tax returns. Nigeria has officially become the only country where you can go to jail for prostitution in the morning and then get a tax bill for it by evening. President Bola Tinubu’s tax reform lead, Taiwo Oyedele, who chairs the Presidential Committee on Fiscal Policy…

RECENTLY, former Kaduna State governor Mallam Nasir El-Rufai called on former Vice President Atiku Abubakar to rally Nigerians to oust President Bola Ahmed Tinubu in 2027, claiming that Tinubu wants to make himself a “life president.” He alleged that Tinubu’s administration was tilting towards authoritarianism, stressing that there were glaring signs that the president wants to sit tight. My reaction to El-Rufai’s latest political theatrics? This is desperate opposition politics at its worst, and the timing couldn’t be more suspicious. El-Rufai made these comments during Atiku’s solidarity visit following a recent attack on some ADC leaders in Kaduna. But let’s…

AFRICA’s richest man Aliko Dangote is not a happy man at the moment, and the reasons are not far-fetched. I don’t think Dangote has spoken to the press and granted interviews the way he did in the last one year. In fact, he has granted more interviews and press conferences in the last one year than in the previous five years combined. Last year, his tiff with the Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation (NNPC )is well documented. Now he’s facing a new battle, this time with labour unions who are threatening to shut down his $20 billion refinery if he doesn’t…

IT’s that time of the year when every football fan in Nigeria has become a mathematician and statistician. With the draw against South Africa on Tuesday, Nigeria’s chances of playing in next year’s World Cup in USA, Canada and Mexico has become slimmer than a Lagos traffic warden’s patience. The numbers don’t lie, and they’re as painful as they are embarrassing. South Africa are in pole position with 17 points and +8 goal difference. Benin – yes, tiny Benin are second with 14 points, sitting pretty three points ahead of Nigeria. We’re tied with Rwanda on 11 points but ahead…

THIS is definitely one of the saddest news I have seen or read in a long time. A tragic incident unfolded on Wednesday afternoon under the Mabushi Bridge in Abuja, where a family of three – a man, his wife, and their son lost their lives following a violent encounter with touts, popularly known as ‘Agberos’. According to eyewitness accounts, the family was driving in a Toyota Highlander after purchasing a brand new refrigerator when they were chased from the Berger axis by three touts. T he touts reportedly forced their way into the vehicle and began dragging the steering…

THIS week I was wondering what to write on this column. Many things have been said and done and it’s just a repetition of events. Then former Super Eagles defender Taribo West stirred the hornet’s nest when he said “I would never advise my son to play for this country” as he lamented the neglect of late Peter Rufai and slammed the NFF and Lagos State at the funeral. Expectedly, he has been receiving knocks, and it has also brought to the fore the entitlement mentality of some of our sports stars. My reaction to Taribo’s outburst? He’s completely off…

LAST weekend’s bye elections for the National Assembly held in some states of the federation provided an interesting political barometer. For political observers like myself, it was an opportunity to see if the new kid on the block, African Democratic Congress (ADC) led by former vice president Atiku Abubakar, former Kaduna State governor Nasir El-Rufai, and former Rivers State governor Rotimi Amaechi, could show their political strength. However, it was not to be. According to official results, the All Progressive Congress(APC)won 12 of the 16 constituencies contested across 12 states. The All Progressives Grand Alliance (APGA) secured two seats, while…

JUST when you think you have heard the most absurd thing in Nigeria, you get hit on the face with a new tomfoolery. The Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) says it is working with the Nigeria Correctional Service (NCoS) on the voting rights of inmates. INEC Chairman, Mahmood Yakubu, disclosed this while receiving the Comptroller General of NCoS, Sylvester Nwakuche, at the Commission’s headquarters in Abuja. According to Yakubu, the Appeal Court has granted inmates the right to register and vote in elections, and INEC is exploring how to implement this. “We are aware that the right to vote is…

PETER Obi has done it again. The Labour Party’s former presidential candidate has thrown the political space into another frenzy with his recent declaration that he’ll serve only one term if elected in 2027. As expected, politicians and armchair analysts are falling over themselves to either praise this “statesmanlike” gesture or dismiss it as another campaign gimmick. My thoughts on this? I think we’re having the wrong conversation entirely. Don’t get me wrong – I understand the political chess game Obi is playing. He’s reading the room correctly. Most northerners who supported a southern candidate in 2023 are already positioning…

LAST week, the Super Falcons of Nigeria did what they do best – they made us proud. Against all odds, they defeated host Morocco 3-2 to clinch their 10th Women’s African Cup of Nations title, cementing their status as the undisputed queens of African football. For a moment, all Nigerians forgot their tribal and religious differences and celebrated as one people. It was beautiful. Then President Bola Tinubu did something remarkable. On Monday, he hosted these heroines and announced national honours of Order of The Niger (OON), three-bedroom houses in Abuja, and a cash donation of $100,000 to each player.…

HERE we go again. Former Vice President Atiku Abubakar has packed his political bags once more, this time pitching his tent with the African Democratic Congress (ADC). The man who has made party-hopping an art form is at it again, and predictably, Nigerians are having a field day with their criticisms. “Is it by force to be president?” they ask. “Doesn’t he know it’s the South’s turn?” others wonder. Even I have taken my fair share of swipes at the Waziri of Adamawa on this very page. But today, I want to take a different approach entirely. Let me ask…

HERE we go again. Like a broken record, Nigeria has returned to its favorite pastime constitutional tinkering. Every few years, we dust off this tired debate about whether we need a new constitution or should return to the parliamentary system. It’s like watching a movie you’ve seen a hundred times, except this one never has a happy ending. The latest round of constitutional evangelists are out in full force, preaching their gospel on television stations across the country. Some are waxing lyrical about the 1963 constitution as if it were the holy grail of governance. Others are convinced that a…

LAST week, EFCC Chairman Ola Olukoyede made another passionate appeal to the National Assembly to pass the unexplained wealth bill. For over a year now, he has been begging our lawmakers to criminalise unexplained wealth, and frankly, I don’t blame him. I am 100 percent in support of the bill. We have too many overnight millionaires in Nigeria whose lifestyles don’t match their known sources of income. How does a civil servant earning N200,000 monthly suddenly acquire properties worth N500 million? How does a fresh graduate driving a N50 million car explain his source of wealth? These are the questions…

SO the Federal Ministry of Agriculture and Food Security wants us to pray away hunger. Yes, you read that right. In a country where millions go to bed hungry, our brilliant officials have discovered the ultimate solution: prayer and fasting sessions for “divine intervention.” I nearly choked on my morning tea when I read this. After the predictable public outcry, they quickly backtracked, claiming they’re not organising prayers to address food insecurity. Too late, the cat is already out of the bag. But wait, there’s more. We’ve watched governors organise prayer sessions for security and development. I remember one governor…

ANOTHER day, another massacre in Benue State. This time, over 200 innocent souls were cut down in cold blood in Yelewata and Daudu communities in Guma Local Government Area. Just 48 hours before this latest carnage, 25 people had been slaughtered in two other communities in Makurdi LGA. My thoughts on this? We have reached a point where condemnation has become a useless ritual. We have perfected the art of outrage without action. As usual, we are getting the same tired script from our leaders. President Bola Tinubu directs security agencies to fish out the killers. Opposition members blame the…

ON Thursday Nigerians marked another June 12 Democracy Day celebration, and I can’t help but wonder if we’re celebrating or commiserating. Twenty-six years of unbroken democracy – that sounds impressive on paper, doesn’t it? But when you peel back the layers, what exactly are we celebrating? Let me be clear from the start – I’m not one of those armchair critics calling for military rule. God forbid! Anyone suggesting we return to khaki rule should have their heads examined. But that doesn’t mean we should be popping champagne either. The irony of celebrating democracy on June 12 is not lost…

I THOUGHT the former minister of transportation Rotimi Amaechi was being misquoted as usual when he said he is hungry. You know the fake news epidemic we have in this country. I had to google the quote to see the full story. Hear him: “We don’t want to move the country forward. My passport was seized in Germany, I did nothing. My offense is that I’m carrying a green passport. They kept me for nearly 30 minutes and I was going for a medical check up in Vienna. So if you’re not ashamed, I’m,” Amaechi said. “Nigerian elites are not…

THE Peoples Democratic Party has outdone itself this time. When the Federal Capital Territory Administration task force sealed their national headquarters on Monday over unpaid ground rent, the party’s acting National Chairman, Umar Damagum, declared it “the height of irresponsibility” and a threat to democracy. I had to read Damagum’s statement three times to be sure I wasn’t hallucinating. So when did paying your debts become an assault on democracy? When did fulfilling basic obligations transform into political persecution? Trust our politicians to always turn molehills into mountains and make themselves martyrs when caught red-handed. The PDP owes ground rent…

JUST when you think you have seen it all, our lawmakers have come up with a brilliant idea that would make even the most creative Nollywood scriptwriter green with envy. A Bill for an Act to Amend the Electoral Act, 2002 to make it mandatory for Nigerians of maturity age to vote in all national and state elections has scaled second reading in the House of Representatives. Let that sink in for a moment. So these are the same lawmakers who have consistently failed to deliver on their basic legislative duties, the same ones who have turned the hallowed chambers…

JUST when we thought we could finally sleep with both eyes closed, when we heard the fairy tale that Boko Haram was technically defeated, the terrorists have returned with a vengeance that should make every Nigerian shake their head in disbelief. The audacity! The sheer bloody audacity of these animals. They didn’t just return quietly. No, these degenerates decided to announce their comeback by sacking entire military formations, carting away weapons worth millions, and leaving our brave soldiers fleeing to their villages like civilians. Is this the same military that was supposedly winning the war against insurgency? Five soldiers killed…