IN a world obsessed with instant gratification and convenience, we often forget the true essence of relationships. We crave partners who possess a laundry list of desirable qualities, yet neglect to cultivate those same traits within ourselves.
This disconnect between our expectations and our actions leads to dissatisfaction and, ultimately, disillusionment. We romanticize grand gestures and extravagant displays of affection while overlooking the simple acts of kindness and everyday effort that truly strengthen a bond.
Instead of chasing an ideal that may not even exist, let’s ground ourselves in reality. Focus on fostering genuine connection, open communication, and unwavering support. Remember, a relationship is a two-way street, and both partners must be committed to nurturing it.
Embrace the small moments, the shared laughter, and the quiet conversations. Celebrate each other’s successes and offer comfort during times of difficulty. Be present, be understanding, and be willing to compromise.
When we choose to invest our time, energy and love into the relationship, we create something far more profound than any temporary convenience could ever offer. We build a foundation of trust, respect, and appreciation that will weather any storm.
So, let’s stop seeking shortcuts and start putting in the work. Let’s be the partners we deserve, not just the ones we desire. Let’s choose reality over illusion and build a love that lasts.
All these put are intentionality, compromise, commitment, acceptance, and growth. Also overconsumption of contaminative stories and scenarios about others’ relationships. The normalized pettiness about heartbreaks and betrayals.
Wrong overviews of ourselves when it comes to serving our partners, sometimes it’s not about what people did wrong it’s about what they never did right because they are too fixated on their ways. stay true to your reality when you’re putting in your healthy self and not dwell on the reasons they give for their inconsistencies and misbehavior.
If it’s worth it for them they’ll value your time and build capacity for it to work. Otherwise, Let them bask in their illusion of disposability.
I have waited a long time to write this because of the itch to scratch the doables and dont-dos of modern-day relationships. It’s true that in today’s society, there can be a lot of focus on individual desires and what one believes they deserve in a relationship. This emphasis on personal needs and expectations can sometimes overshadow the importance of giving, sacrifice, compromise, and service to our partners.
It requires a balance between expressing one’s own desires while also being empathetic and considerate towards the other person.
Love without sacrifice, compromise, and service can limit the growth and fulfillment of a relationship. Everyone talks about what they deserve but not what they can give. In our minds, we all want the perfect spouse but have you improved yourself lately to be a perfect spouse too?
Everyone wants to reap the fruits of commitment but lacks the grace to water it. A sad generation indeed with happy pictures. when we all have the ‘less’ in us – and relationships only work with the acknowledgment of our ordinariness.
There is too much wokeness and lack of kindness. People often talk about love, kindness, talk humanity but do the exact opposite. It’s all in our heads, our expectations and understanding are too idealistic. Men want feminine women, and women want manly men but we persecute masculinity and feminist activism in vogue.
Today, Love and any other relationship are rationalized equally instead of pouring our all without reservation, We are being too calculative. It’s always what you tend to get at the end. like some sort of competition.
Even the great have weaknesses but we want accomplished, sophisticated, and wealthy all at a time-NOW. We have to be patient to get there. it is a process, a gradual one. Let’s not be fickle, short-fused, and egotistic. Let’s bring an end to marketing our relationships as content on social media more than we do trying to build it.
For a generation that has a wealth of knowledge and access to so many things, our parents were not privileged to have and given limited access to information and technology. This generation is kind of a messed up one, we need to do much much better.
No sentiments. Bring Back Our Reality.
Kabara, is a writer and public commentator. Her syndicated column, Voice, appears on News Point Nigeria newspaper on Mondays. She can be reached on hafceekay01@gmail.com